Juice Fast, Day 4

Yesterday was hard. Not physically - physically I felt great and even completed a workout! From my research, I didn't expect to start feeling really good until around Day 4 or 5 at the earliest, but by Day 2 I was already feeling better. But mentally this is really tough. In the 6 weeks preceding my juice cleanse, I had worked pretty hard on diet and exercise. I was working out 4+ times a week and had eliminated foods that are really bad for you (fast food, most processed food) and really cut back on foods that are fairly bad for you (organic processed foods, non-organic products, dairy, red meat). I wasn't really missing any of the foods I had cut out or limited, but now that seems to be all I can think about! I had planned to start back into eating with whole foods and a plant-based diet. While I know in my head that is still what I will do, the rest of me is screaming for a cheeseburger, a bowl of spaghetti with garlic bread, or a chicken pot pie.

I've never felt the battle between the flesh and the spirit, as it pertains to food, as strongly I am right now. One side of me is convincing myself that as long as I don't go overboard and continue working out then I can eat some of those things. That part of me is clinging to things like 'focusing on every single ingredient and analyzing every single thing I put in my mouth is stressful and stress is counterproductive' or 'eating and food are meant to be enjoyed and not enjoying them is stressful and stress is counterproductive' or worst of all, 'who cares if I'm a little heavier than I want to be?'

Then the other side of me pipes in and reminds me that I've already lost a total of 15 pounds and 2 dress sizes in the past 6 weeks - 7 pounds and 1 dress size of that being from the last 3 days of this juice cleanse alone. It points out that I can see visible changes in my problem areas. It reminds me that I'm finally fitting into clothes that I've wanted to wear for far too long now (I'm currently wearing a shirt that my hubby bought me for Christmas in 2011 but hasn't fit until today). It reminds me that my health on the inside is just as or more important than my shape on the outside and that I don't want to ruin all of the good progress I've made.

This battle is fierce y'all. Way harder than not eating. Unless I'm seeing food on the TV or smelling what my hubby is cooking, I haven't even noticed that it's been almost 4 days since I've eaten anything. It's surprising how satisfied and fulfilled I feel on the juice alone. This fast has become almost entirely about retraining my thoughts. Right now I know I have to keep going with it until my mind and my body can get on the same page or find a compromise.